I do not need to reiterate what has already been said about Kanye. In truth the man has expressed himself and been ridiculed and reviled by some, while celebrated and welcomed by others. In this he has revealed his genius does not come without a price as he revealed his battle with bipolar disorder, which he claims as a superpower.

It seems mental health is the new vogue; with a rash of celebrity suicides there is much introspection on the concept of support and what it really means. To the benefit of those lucky enough to not suffer from mental illness they will truly never understand the constant battle within oneself.

I struggle with bipolar disorder. In my personal concept I see the damage I create with my illness. It has ended most of my relationships with friends and lovers, it leaves me isolated from my family, it saps my very basic motivation leaving me sloth and stationary.

But for the grace of god I find myself married today. It is not an easy relationship; I am ashamed to say that I have never been a good partner to this fine deserving young woman. I can be a wastrel in manic moments spending thousands of dollars on meaningless trinkets and extravagant experiences. I can be harsh and unforgiving blasting hateful palaver in her direction striking to core of her insecurities. I become unfaithful in boredom, lost in my mind I justify the most insane of ideas. I can at times be the very incarnation of evil. At times I can be the fairy godmother. The whiplash of realities is tiring; madness and calm are in a constant battle for your mind.

Living with the memories of the pain you have caused is a harsh reality. It is unlikely one would enter a new relationship given the foresight of pain that may come. If we had that foresight it would be easy to simply avoid those relationships.

Upon introspection and the realization of the pain you have caused there is a tic in your mind, there is no avoiding that you have caused pain. From that moment that person will never forget that pain. So we must work with it, most often people learn from their mistakes and the pain is abated. I never learn, my mistakes are as perpetual as my mood swings.

Through all the chaos I create, my wife has never left my side. I am grateful; she like Atlas bears a burdened weight. I cannot praise enough the time and effort she puts in to ensure our existence is as smooth as possible. I, her mortal test, challenge her at seemingly every turn, and yet she will rebuff. I expose my darkest realities and she shines a beacon light.

I love this woman with all my heart. She deserves better. I am thankful she does not feel the same way.

I can only imagine from retrospection on my own battles, what it must be like with fame and fortune. I cannot speak for the experience of Kanye and Kim but I can imagine despite opportunity and privilege Kim must still burden the weight of Kanye’s illness.

For better or worse, creative genius or solemn slug, the reality is that people who support those with mental illness will always bear the immense and most silent weight of the person they supports concepts and conventions.

There is more to my story, I’m sure I will get around to expounding upon it more.

It is an interesting conceit that those with mental illness are more prone to creativity. Throughout time we have been introduced to the eclectic master, as the saying attributed to Aristotle goes, “There is no great genius without some touch of madness.” An eccentric who through force of will, creates something powerful or awe-inspiring. Lincoln, Beethoven, Munch, Darwin all afflicted by some form of debilitation or another.

Maybe Kanye is right, maybe bipolar disorder is indeed his superpower. I claim no genius so I cannot presume how the two may intercede, but from those examples we can see some correlation between mental health and creativity.

Since his personal revelation Kanye has released two albums ye and KIDS SEE GHOSTS with Kid Cuddi. At the time of ye’s release I was in no mood to listen to what I though was a trite and flippant response to being called out on every level. To be honest I still have yet to give the album the listen it is due. I can speak to KIDS SEE GHOSTS though. As an amalgam of the mentality of Kanye and Kid Cudi it exemplifies the nature of mental illness, both men have now well documented histories with mental illness. The entire album speaks to the reality and being of disorders. My review is forthcoming for KIDS SEE GHOSTS. So I will delve into its more basic premise, but I will for now full heartedly endorse it as a modern understanding of mental illness, a true masterpiece.

From critical genius to pain and suffering the life of those with mental illness is never simple, it is never easy. We undermine the truth of the matter by hiding what is real to us. Others who offer help are to often deterred by the rough reality that exists within the realm of mental illness.

For those who stand with us though, through reality and madness,

I thank you.